Friday, February 5, 2010

change in direction

I told my dad today that I have decided to minor in criminal justice. He took it pretty well. I know this isn't the path he had hoped for me to choose. He wanted me to minor in music. I feel bad about it; all I hope for is to become someone he can be proud of. But I won't decide my future based solely on what he wants me to become. This is something I have to inevitably decide myself. Because art is not a stable way to make money, I need a backup that IS stable, and music isn't any better than art. For me, music would actually be far worse. I do enjoy playing violin, but I'm not one of those prodigy violinists or even anything close. I don't have what it takes to be successful in that field. I had to work five times harder than any of the other violinists when I was in high school... and even after all that practice, I never could vibrato properly because of the way my fingers are. So obviously, if I can't even manage to vibrato correctly, I can't make it as a professional violinist.
So yes, minoring in criminal justice, and if art proves to be something I can't support myself with, I will go through training to become a police officer. I think this may sound like a strange decision to some, but if you've known me for long enough, you may have heard me mention wanting to become an officer or detective several years ago. For one reason or another, I had decided I was incapable of such a job, but I'm rather tired of this negative way of thinking, and I want to try harder to aim for jobs I really want to do instead of immediately dismissing it because I don't think I'm good enough/strong enough/smart enough.
I still with all of my heart want to be an artist, but I am not stupid enough to aim for art without a backup plan.

Ironically, my drawing for today is of an ex cop LOL.
(huge picture sorry D:)

This is suuuch a mess right now LOL. Sketch of a commission I'm doing for pickles-chan. She asked me to draw Leon for her *v* I haven't done a CG of Leon in a really long time, so this will be fun! I am still and always will be a huge Leon fangirl, hahaha.

3 comments:

bear said...

The only thing that I find unusual(?) about you choosing to be a cop would be the danger level--although, there's probably not a whole lot of major crime or anything in Kansas anyway xD
Even so, I think that'd be a pretty good job choice for you [not to mention cool] Especially if it's something you've wanted to do for such a long time.
I'd /love/ to see you become successful in art, but I'd be happy for you either way :>
You can expect me to be wishing you luck and stuff no matter what :D

Oh, and that's a super hot sketch btw ;D

PriceOfSleep said...

hellyeah you can be successfull in anything you want to be!(not to mention you'd make a total kick ass police officer)
I want-love- to see you do whatever makes you happy, and getting your dream aswell!
<3 i'll be here wishing you luck!
haha you inspire me aswell

Autumn said...

Myou>
yeah, I know there is a prominent danger level involved with that job. but if I do end up becoming an officer, I will be trained specifically for being in dangerous situations so I'm able to stand my ground to the best of my abilities, so I'll (hopefully) be okay hahah.
my hope is that I will be successful enough with art that I won't have to turn to my alternate career anyway though LOL
thanks <3

Onions>
thank you! <33